The tension between enabling and helping.
I don't like to admit how awkward I have felt in this situation.
The answer is to do something, but…
“I only have my phone with me.”
“Giving cash may enable an addict rather than help.”
“It’s not a safe area”.
“The traffic light turned green.”
I have wrestled with this situation longer than I would like to admit.
I have given cash. I have also walked by. I have donated to shelters. I have offered gift cards. I have also kept walking, engrossed in conversation, and ignored them.
I feel guilty. I feel wrong and mean.
When I don’t help, I can not look that person in the eye. I walk by deep in a conversation, or keep the car window rolled up and look ahead. Yep, I ignore, but inside I feel like a real jerk.
When I do help, it’s heartwarming to look the person in the eye and exchange a few words, and it hits me in the heart, often overwhelmed by the exchange.
Situations like this can be left unsettled, and we go on and on thinking… I’ll do better next time, or excuse our failure to help someone else. We are busy, and we do good somewhere else until something hits us and makes us see the way forward. A little conversion of thought, and that is what happened to me.
When I heard a quote from St. Mother Teresa of Calcutta. She explained a simple way to remember Matthew 25:40: "Amen, I say to you, whatever you did for one of these least brothers of mine, you did for me." She touches each finger and says these 5 words, “You did it to me.”
That is the call, period.
Now the cardboard sign is a decision point for me. Not whether or not to help, but how.
I keep gift cards for food in the car to give. I have seen people get food for the homeless from a nearby restaurant. I like that idea also.
It means doing something. Turning around if the light turns green and driving by again to hand them a gift card, or going through the closest drive-through to grab some food. It may be handing them a little cash in a pinch.
I have come to a conclusion that we judge too much in our society today.
My new outlook has become that if a person asks for help and misuses the donation, that is between them and God; but if I don't make the effort, that is between God and me.
I am grateful to have an abundance to share. It is not mine after all; it has been given to me.
Rather than seeing this situation as a social burden, I see it as an honor and a blessing to be on the giving side, and it’s funny how, with this attitude, all the awkwardness disappears, and joy takes its place, especially in the moment you look someone in the eye and offer them a little love, hope, and sustenance.
What do you do?
Matthew 25:35: "For I was hungry, and you gave me food; I was thirsty, and you gave me drink; a stranger, and you welcomed me."